Beauty from Ashes

My husband and I have spent the last year on a faith journey with the Lord and I am happy to say that I’m baaack!

A year ago my husband and I found ourselves in a discussion about simplifying our life. Our home that was once filled with kiddos and a lot of action was now filled with just us!  Our kiddos are no longer kids, they are adults now with lives and homes of their own.  We realized that we were actually living in about a fourth of our home; do we really need 3 living spaces for 2 people? And what about that horrible drive to and from work that my husband was driving each day? 100 miles round trip, who needs that? What happened to the simpler life of the Fun Fifties where you s l o w down and take life a little easier? We were perplexed! What are we doing wrong Lord? The more I thought about it I realized that simplifying our life wasn’t going to *poof* just happen, we were going to have to make some changes.

To simplify implies that it is simple!  But simplifying your life involves the C word, CHANGE! And change can be challenging, it can be scary, and depending on how great the change, it can be extremely stressful.  For me, moving 50 miles West brought all of the above, for my husband it was easy!  Women are emotional, men are fixers…there ya have it!

And so change began…

There was a house to pack up and sell, a house to buy (one that was smaller and more practical for the two of us), a job I was going to have to leave, and a new job I was going to have to find. We had a new grandbaby and children we would be moving further away from; oh my heart was in panic mode. HELP!

Interestingly, in the midst of all of the crazy emotions, I knew this was the right thing to do. I began to feel a peace deep inside my spirit, my heart just needed to get with the program! I knew we were making this move for all the right reasons and we had to trust the Lord to lead us and bring it all together for us.  Another faith walk!

So, that’s what we did. We prayed for God to take charge, to protect us from wrong decisions, to lead us to our new home and to lead that perfect couple to the home we were selling. Together we trusted God with all of the details, which were many!  And then we walked it out one day at a time.

One day at a time… 

“So don’t be anxious about tomorrow. God will take care of your tomorrow too. Live one day at a time.” (Matthew 6:34 TLB) Boy that is surly easier said than done for many of us, especially if you’re like me! When I make a decision I jump in with both feet and its full speed ahead to completion! Well simplifying our life was going to take time, it was not going to be an overnight transition and there were going to be many things out of my control.

A year later I find myself sitting here in a house that has now become our home, it is perfect! The town we moved to is 6 miles from my husband’s office, he barely drinks a sip of his coffee and he’s at work. Our neighbors are like Mayberry R.F.D 🙂 Everyone is so neighborly, kind and friendly! Our son, daughter-in-law and grandbaby are 40 minutes away from us now. I was heartbroken at the thought of being so far, but they have been amazing!  They send us pictures and videos almost daily and we see them at least once a week. A few months before we moved, our daughter and her fiancé moved to the West side to be closer to their jobs, they are only 3 miles from us!

What did I learn?

Once again, I was reminded that He’s got our back. When you ask God to lead, you’ve got to get out of the way and you’ve got to trust Him. He is the Boss and He knows what’s best for us. He has a plan for your life and mine that He has personally and meticulously handcrafted! The Bible says, “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” (Psalm 139:16 NLT)

As we began to submit to His perfect will for our life the pieces started falling into place. Faith is grown out of the times in our lives when we are most vulnerable. Our faith is able to grow greater than our fears when we take His hand and walk with Him through the uncertainties of this life.

Welcome to our simplified life and home!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I had an opportunity to spend a couple of hours with some pretty special people recently. Jean, Mary, Neil, Joyce and Wilma are all residents at a care facility for people with Alzheimer’s and Dementia.

Here is my story…

While playing a fiercely competitive card game called War, or as Joyce called it, Battle, a gal walked past our table and sat down on the sofa. She was hunched over and holding her stomach, I thought maybe she didn’t feel well or was disabled. I excused myself and walked over to her, maybe she’d like to play cards with us.

Her name was Wilma. As I sat down next to her, she very proudly let me know that she was a Bridge player! And so our conversation began…

Wilma told me wonderful stories about her husband Angelo; what an amazing husband he was. Oh, how they enjoyed playing Bridge with all of their friends. She reminded me several times, “We’re Bridge players!” I learned that she had been married a very long time to her husband Angelo and that they had several children, she couldn’t remember exactly how many, but she loved family, and she loved her family.

Wilma talked about being positive and staying away from negative people because like she said, “Who needs that!”

She wanted to know if I was married, how many children I had and where I worked. Wilma was very interested to know if I was happy! I shared my story and showed her pictures, oh how she loved seeing my pictures.

And then we’d start the entire conversation all over again! For about 30 minutes we shared her story and my story over and over again. And with each re-start I was taken in by her smile, her enthusiasm and her genuine interest in every word I had to say.

Sure, some of the details changed with each rendition. For example she had been married a very long time, and then she had been married about 12 years and another time she and Angelo never married; they were happy and didn’t feel the need to! HA!

That’s what Alzheimer’s and Dementia does to people; it scrambles the information in their memories and it deletes memories all together.

Wilma was a hoot!   She had a wonderful sense of humor, a great outlook on life and was so appreciative of the time I spent talking with her.

The power of your presence…

I went into this experience thinking about what I was giving these sweet people by spending time with them.  But as I walked away I realized what they had given me. 

Never underestimate the power of a caring heart. The sacrifice of your time may reap larger rewards than you can imagine.

Oh…I almost forgot! Remember I said Wilma was hunched over and holding her stomach? When I sat down with her I offered her a cup of water. She thanked me and told me she had a cup but wasn’t thirsty. Then she reached into the front of her pants, pulled out a little plastic water cup and said, “I’ve got my cup, they charge you for everything you know, nothing’s for free!” And then she put her cup back into the front of her pants! 🙂

 

“Our Father loves us too much to let us pass through life without learning to endure.”

When I read that this morning I thought about my Grandma Mildred (pictured here with my Mom).

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines endure as dealing with or accepting something unpleasant. 

My Grandma Mildred was cold, unfriendly and not a fan of children. She seemed to tolerate me, my sister and brother, I remember her discomfort well. It would be accurate to say that she was unpleasant.

We visited my Grandma about once a month; my parents drove us to her home where we spent a few hours with her. My parents and Grandma visited while my sister, brother and I sat on the floor in front of the television.

My Grandma Mildred never played with me, held me in her lap, or read me a book.  In fact, there were many things she never did with me. She had no patience for children and it didn’t take much to annoy her.

I didn’t understand my Grandma but I accepted the fact that I had no choice but to endure the time spent with her.

What was it about this woman that caused her to be like she was? I was intrigued by her nonetheless, so when I became an adult I reached out to her and made a date to spend one-on-one time together. After that I made another date, and another, and so on.

As I did this, God began to show me things about her, things that were lost in my young mind but stood out now that I was an adult. I realized that she was at the center of many of my wonderful childhood memories.

For example, she was at every holiday celebration with her yellow ceramic bowl filled with homemade Creamed Corn and a batch of homemade Chocolate Chip Cookies! (LOVED the cookies, hated the corn!). She never missed a holiday and she never came without these 2 staples!

Those monthly visits that seemed like torture at the time? Well, God began to reveal the sweetness of the things my Grandma did during those visits. For example, about an hour before it was time to leave she would call us into the kitchen and give us each a bowl of spumoni ice-cream!

It was at one of those monthly visits that I saw The Wizard of OZ for the first time. I remember sitting on the floor with my sister and brother as we watched with AMAZEMENT at the wonder of it all!

I’ll never forget the Easter she showed up at our home with Chocolate Easter Baskets from See’s Candies Store, one for each of us kids. The basket itself was made out of chocolate and the chocolate basket was filled with chocolates, it was heaven! Every time I go into a See’s Candies Store I think of her.

My Grandma Mildred was always impeccably dressed, with painted fingernails and hair perfectly coiffed, she had this movie star quality about her. She loved her cats and the singer Engelbert Humperdink! There were alligator knick-knacks all over her house and she couldn’t pass up a bargain. She is the only person I’ve ever known who ate her meals without taking a drink until after she’d finish eating.

Yes, Grandma Mildred had a cold exterior but as I got to know her I realized that her interior was quite the opposite. I believe she loved family and actually yearned to be part of the whole.  For reasons unknown to me she was not comfortable expressing emotions of warmth and love but as we spent time together I was able to give these things to her.

I believe that enduring her throughout the years taught me that what you see on the outside isn’t always an accurate indicator of things on the inside.

Yes, God loves me and you too much to let us simply pass through this life without learning to endure.

Romans 5:3-4 says, Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope…

I am proud of the relationship I shared with my Grandma Mildred and every special memory we made together. She knew my husband and my children. The last visit I had with her was unlike any other; we laughed so hard and shared so much.

It would have been easy to let go of this relationship, I am thankful that I didn’t. God surely blessed both me and my Grandma as I endured with her.

Do you have a Grandma Mildred in your life? What are you learning as you endure this relationship?

This is a story about God meeting our needs.

“And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)

In the early 1990’s we were in an economic recession and times were tough for a lot of people, including us.  My husband’s salary had been cut and I was running a home day care to help make ends meet.

This particular day I received a call from friends of ours letting me know that the husband had lost his job. They had two children and the wife was working part-time so I knew this was going to be difficult for them. I wanted to help, but what could I do?

The first thing I did was pray and asked God to bless them. Suddenly I got a notion to go through my pantry and donate from what I had, what a great idea! I grabbed food items and paper products along with laundry detergent, etc.

Then my mind started to think bigger thoughts. “What about the neighbors on my street? Why not give them the opportunity to bless this couple.”

To be blessed by others is great, but we also need to be a blessing to others when we are able.

So I got in my minivan and drove house to house, knocking on doors and inviting my neighbors to help this family. I was overwhelmed with their responses; they could not have been more generous. They gave me bags of food, cleaning products, and bath and laundry items. My neighbors were so willing to help this family out; a family that they didn’t even know! It warmed my heart.

Finally I was at the last house. I knocked on the door and an elderly woman answered.  I introduced myself and explained what I was doing.  She told me that she didn’t have any items to donate but wanted to know if it would be alright to give the family a check.  I told her I was sure they could use it to purchase whatever they didn’t receive from the other donations; she seemed so happy to be able to participate.

The elderly woman handed me a check for $35.00.

By now my minivan was packed with grocery bags busting at the seams so I drove over to our friend’s home.  I knocked on their door and asked them to come out and help me unload some things.  I wish you could have seen their faces when I slid open the side door of my minivan, they were amazed! I explained that my neighbors and I had gone shopping for them in our pantries; they were really moved by the outpouring of generosity.

The three of us gathered all of the items and took them into their home.  Then I handed the wife the check for $35.00 and she began to cry.  She explained that her checkbook had gone into the negative that day for…$35.00!

God is so faithful and amazing!

It’s real life experiences like this one that build my faith and reveal the truth of God’s word.  He keeps his promises.  He said he would meet our needs and he does, every time.

Do you have a story to share about God meeting your needs?  I would love to hear it!